In this post I would like to clarify some points. I started this blog in April 2010. The primary aim was to speak my heart out. I was not comfortable with some comments of the psychiatrists. I have mentioned many facts in different posts that never arose in my brief discussions with psychiatrists. Yet they
Tag: Indian Spy
I think this would be the last post on my illness. The main purpose of this post is to analyze myself with respect to the disease. I will also try to review my major delusions and clarify some points.
I have mentioned my major delusions in previous posts. In this post I will discuss my other delusions that I developed in my first psychotic phase in 2005.
This is last exclusive post on the ‘event of my life’, the PMA incident mentioned in this post. In that post I also mentioned that the first three incidents in quick succession were followed by worsening of Pakistan India relations and that I saw the ‘list’ factor in all that. This post is about explaining
This post is a mixture of facts, delusions and opinions. The three generals namely Major General (R) Ameer Faisal Alavi, General (R) Muhammad Yusaf Khan and General Tariq Majeed were sources of some delusions in both of my psychotic phases. One has been murdered mysteriously, one is retired and one is still serving. I had
This was the most visible and expressive part of my illness. It was an important but not the only part of the disease. Whereas I remained secretive about my religious delusions, I was more than vocal about my personal delusions. This was very clear indication to my family and friends that I had some psychotic
I will finish the religious delusions part by mentioning my thoughts on one important major sign of Last hour i.e. the Beast. As I narrated in an earlier post that I came close to declaring myself the Beast. Major signs are events of extraordinary nature prophesied by our Prophet to take place before Last Hour
This is in continuation of my previous post. The first theory that I developed and discussed can be considered ‘rational’. How I came from first theory to the second one that I am going to describe is unclear even to me. I came upon the second theory gradually in 2005. The thing that I was
This is in continuation of my earlier post i.e. Five Facts. It is about the second incident that occurred in PMA, Kakul. This is an ideal case in which I will narrate how I came from rational thinking to delusional thinking. The “list” was the main source of delusions of both grandeur and persecution.
In this post I will narrate the incidents briefly that were main sources of delusional thinking. I will analyze them in more detail in future posts. (1) It was 8 January 1996. I was in Kohat undergoing aptitude tests for induction in Army. Far away, my grandfather aged 80 placed his stick, Jinnah cap and