I have not experienced a major relapse since 2015. I had one hospitalization for two weeks against my will in 2016. The reason being I misbehaved with my mother. I have increased sense of confidence since 2015 that I would not have any problem whatsoever in future. I am without medications for over 6 months and going strong. I have more than one reason to believe that my activities especially online are being monitored. Imam Mahdi (AS) and Jesus Christ (PBUH) are too big personalities. Recently I have become obsessed with the concept of end-time Elijah, rapture and two witnesses. Moreover I feel that I have some religious and political agenda since 2 years. This is due to some dreams that I would not narrate and related coincidences. My two attempts to get married after diagnosis were based on big coincidences. Only God could have planned that. Now these two instances have become intermingled somehow. I need a job to get married. Keeping in view my past experiences, I am not looking for job/study in Pakistan or the marriage. I am waiting for a miracle. I am happy with online learning and self study.
Recently I had a vision/hallucination on laptop that I am giving too much thought lately. I was browsing the internet as usual in the morning while all of a sudden I noticed something unusual. I noticed that one search entry in Google was in quite dim color. It was not an ad. It was some hallucination/vision. It was not my first hallucination on laptop. It stated that the proportion of man to women by 2025 will be 1 to 9. But for that to happen about half of the world population mainly male have to be wiped out in next 7 years. I think this is the 7 year tribulation mentioned in Bible. According to some Hadith, the ratio of men to women at end times would be 1 to 50. End time is not that near!
I am giving too much thought as how that might happen. I think there will be two main events during the tribulation: Armageddon and Rapture. I think Prophet Elijah will return somewhere in 2018 in state of Israel. He will be denounced by Muslims as Dajjal/Antichrist as his arrival is not mentioned explicitly in Quran or Hadith. Many Christian churches will also denounce him. Elijah will confront the Antichrist, most probably a UN sectary general. Due to the situation a military alliance between Israel and Syria will be formed. Israel and Syria assisted by Iran and Russia will fight the battle of Armageddon against the coalition of about 80 countries under UN. This battle is referred to as Malhama in Hadith in which 99 out of 100 combatants (almost all men) will be killed. The UN coalition will face defeat and it will signal the end of UN.
I think the rapture will be after the Armageddon when all faithful Christian men (not women) believers will rise into the sky to the Heaven. I believe the period of two witnesses mentioned in the Book of Revelation will be after the rapture. There is confusion about the identity of these two witnesses. Sometimes I have a feeling that I might be one of the two witnesses but the Book mentions that they will be prophets. I know that I am not a prophet. Most probably they will be Elijah and Moses. There will be severe plagues, famines and earthquakes. If my vision has any meaning then the ratio of men to women by 2025 will be 1 to 9. Only God knows better.
My most complicated delusion was about the return of the prophets as mentioned here. I have always been trying to rationalize it. Now I think that the concept of reincarnation is a better explanation. The major religions that hold a belief in reincarnation are Hinduism and Buddhism. Now I think that my grandfather may be the reincarnation of the Jesus Christ (PBUH). It may or may not be regarded as the Second Coming. Jesus Christ will come in bodily form in future and that will be his actual Second Coming. Back in 2009, while I was developing the delusion of returning of prophets, I saw Agha Muhammad Yahya Khan in one of my dream. I started thinking that he was the second coming or reincarnation of prophet Yahya (John the Baptist). I started viewing the 1971 war from an entirely different perspective. He ensured that the base lot of Pakistan Army lands in Indian hands. After the breakup, he handed over the powers to Zulfikar Ali Bhutto. The base lot of Pakistan Army had to remain in Indian prison camps far too long because Bhutto. This lot took its revenge by hanging him. This mysterious cycle is still continuing.